Turned Jews Into Apes and Pigs!
Al Capp Cartoon
and win a scholarship to the art college of your choice!
Al Capp was one
of the great cartoonists of the 20th Century—perhaps the greatest.
There was Walt Kelly and Bill Watterson and not much else. Who can
forget the Yokums and Marrying Sam and Senator Jack S. Fogbound? And
Daisy Mae Scraggs did more for ragged short shorts than Marilyn
Monroe did for hot air vents. Capp’s hillbillies were so rude and
ignorant they made The Three Stooges seem almost as erudite as Noam
Chomsky, Ward Churchill and Frank Rich, and, of course, better
plumbers. Yet no hillbillies, from Granny Clampett to Grandpa McCoy,
ever pursued Al Capp through the streets with a hickory switch.
Joan Baez as Joannie the Phoney and his campus S.W.I.N.E. (Students
Wildly Indignant about Nearly Everything) were forever stuffing
flowers down National Guard gun barrels—flowers which “…naturally,
somebody else growed,” said Li’l Abner. The radical left hated his
guts. What he would have done with Michael Moore and Howard Dean can
only be imagined.
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lampooned Chester Gould’s famous comic strip detective, Dick Tracy,
with his own counter-culture creation, Fearless Fosdick. Tracy fans
were incensed but Gould declined mortal combat. He could have hired
Flattop or Pruneface to rub out Fosdick, but he didn’t, and there
were no demonstrations in front of Gould’s house and no death
threats were issued. It was not always in good fun but art is art
and it has to be seen to be appreciated (That’s from Mortimer:
reductio ad absurdum) Art defines a society—especially comic art; no
art, no comic art, no society. It’s as simple as that.
Al Capp once ran
an art contest in his Li'l Abner comic strip—readers were encouraged
to submit drawings of Lena the Hyena; the world’s ugliest woman.
That was back in the days when no self-respecting barfly could open
a matchbook without some hottie on the inside cover asking him to
“Draw me and win an art scholarship:” so why not a contest to draw a
picture of Mohammed? There are many representations of the
Abominable Snowman and the Loch Ness Monster—certainly no more
terrifying to dhimmis than Mohammed. And there are thousands and
thousands of artistic renderings of Jesus Christ, the Buddha, and L.
Ron Hubbard. But there are no Mohammeds. Shouldn’t the dhimmis have
some idea of what their Stalag-Master might have looked like? Of
Jyllands-Posten, one of Denmark’s largest newspapers, asked 40
cartoonists to submit a likeness of Mohammed, the response was not
what they had anticipated. Capp got thousands and thousands of Lena
submissions but only 12 of the 40 cartoonists approached by
Jyllands-Posten bothered to respond. Nonetheless, it was more than
enough to awaken the world’s sleepiest seismologists. Muslims
throughout the world were outraged. Once again, ignorant dhimmis
were profaning Mohammed! It is against Islamic law to draw pictures
of the Prophet! Allahu akbar! Don’t the dhimmis know anything at
all about peace and tolerance?
Muslims took to the streets; Danish Imam Raed Hlayhel demanded an
apology; death threats were issued; two of the cartoonists went into
hiding; Mohammed Sayed Tantawi, the Alfred Rosenberg of Sunni Islam
and the Grand Sheikh of Al-Azhar University in Cairo, promised to
take the protest to the United Nations’ High Commissioner for Human
Rights, and if that didn’t work, to Mahmoud Ahmadinejad; a Pakistani
terrorist group offered a five thousand kroner reward for anyone
that would kill one of the cartoonists.
Were the drawings
that bad? Were they crude—tasteless? Did someone use the wrong
colors? Did some future Al Capp drift over the lines with his flesh
tones? Or were the representations too accurate? Did they make
Mohammed look like something that had crawled out of Dante’s
Inferno; a sword-wielding kook: a madman with a turban shaped like a
bomb strapped to his head? It doesn’t really matter—a dot on a piece
of paper would have been enough; under Islamic law, any image of the
Prophet is blasphemous.
blowhard spokesman at Al-Azhar University said they fully respected
freedom of opinion and expression and the necessity of protecting
these universal freedoms through laws and constitutions; however,
“…international law experts have agreed that freedom of expression
should not be in violation of other guaranteed freedoms and rights,
including individual and collective sanctities.”
rat-bags at Al-Azhar represent O.J. Simpson? Is that why Judge Roy
Bean kept a six-shooter under his bench whenever somebody reached
for his Holy Book? Islamic law does not trump the Danish
constitution. It doesn’t trump anything. No one in Denmark voted for
it. It’s not legally binding on non-Muslims except for the poor saps
willing to accept a spineless dhimmitude—the number of which,
unfortunately, is growing, especially in Eurabia.
Islamic law is
not the Mayflower Compact. It’s not the Virginia or Kentucky
Resolutions. Hitler’s Nuremberg Laws had at least a patina of
legality. Dianetics makes more sense.
Not that Muslims
don’t appreciate good art; Al-Manar TV, a running dog of the
Lebanese terrorist organization, Hezbollah, produces claymation
films for children called Stories from the Koran. Dr. Zeinab Zamzam
is one of the geniuses behind the stories. On December 7. 2005, Al-Manar
aired their latest claymation special, “Jews Turn Into Apes and
Pigs, are Annihilated and Cast Into the Sea.” This film would have
scared the pants off of Spanky and Alfalfa—especially if they had
spent the Sabbath trying to hook catfish in the Old Millpond instead
of on their knees in Parson Brownlow’s Church of All Denominations.
The film is scarier than The Return of the Frankenstein Monster.
It starts with
Grandpa telling his grandson: “Yes, my child. The Lord ordered us
not to do anything at all on the Sabbath, and to stay at home to
worship the Lord.” That’s right—stay at home and worship the Lord,
and whatever you do, don’t go fishing, especially for the Sabbath
whales who come only on the Sabbath. But Pinhas and Slamloun, a
couple of Jews, have a plan. They will dig a trap on the beach for
the whales the day before the Sabbath and pick them up the day after
the Sabbath! A brilliant plan—they will have their whales and eat
them too without profaning the Holy Day. By this time Spanky and
Alfalfa are all smiles.
wonder, Habakkuk passes by while Pinhas and Shamloun are enjoying
their fish fry. “What is that smell” he says. “It that grilled fish
I smell? Who is that wicked man who is grilling something
To make a long
story short: Pinhas, Shamloun and Habakkuk, who falls victim to his
own greed, are turned into apes and pigs for profaning the Sabbath.
This is done in the name of Allah, the compassionate, the merciful.
And this is where Spanky and Alfalfa swear off catfishing.
One might want
to take a close look at Habakkuk; he could be mistaken for Mohammed.
http://www.memritv.org/search.asp?ACT=S9&P1=964 Study the film,
draw Habakkuk’s phiz and enter it in the Jillands-Posten Mohammed
contest. What’s the worst that could happen—a fatwa, a death threat?
And they say Muslims don’t understand art. Of course, they do; they
just don’t like it
By Denis Schulz
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